The Merth Beaten Worker
...is huuuuge. Mad props and all my love to the man with the plan, all 260 pounds of fun-loving, homer-swatting, walk-getting, teenage-girl-impregnating, value-providing hero. Here's looking at you, kid.
Double-take all you want. Those numbers are for real. And Howard, he is the real thing.
Phillies for life!
Monday, November 20, 2006
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Good News
The Merth Beaten Worker
Just Kidding. More bad news.
Double Fuck.
Judging how things are shaping up today, i think the sports gods have it out for Philly. What are they going to do next? Have Pat Burrell wave his no-trade clause? Oh, no, sports gods. Anything but that. Please don't let us trade Pat Burrell. He's so much better than ALfonso Soriano. Anyone but him.
Just Kidding. More bad news.
Double Fuck.
Judging how things are shaping up today, i think the sports gods have it out for Philly. What are they going to do next? Have Pat Burrell wave his no-trade clause? Oh, no, sports gods. Anything but that. Please don't let us trade Pat Burrell. He's so much better than ALfonso Soriano. Anyone but him.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
The Webb-ster
The Merth Beaten Worker
Yes, I know, kos was all over this one, but its so good and so important that i thought id link it, as well.
Jim Webb, you are a genius.
Way to publish this in the journal and not the times. As you say, it is important for the upper class to understand what they have to gain from the promotion of equality in american life.
Chuck Schumer, i want to have your babies.
seriously. lock their windows at night...
In other news, kudos to House for making the trip to AC to get a delectable I-talian sub and commit second degree murder.
Yes, I know, kos was all over this one, but its so good and so important that i thought id link it, as well.
Jim Webb, you are a genius.
Way to publish this in the journal and not the times. As you say, it is important for the upper class to understand what they have to gain from the promotion of equality in american life.
Chuck Schumer, i want to have your babies.
seriously. lock their windows at night...
In other news, kudos to House for making the trip to AC to get a delectable I-talian sub and commit second degree murder.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Brood-eo 60
The Merth Beaten Worker
OK, so, i think Ive gotten my head around Aaron Sorkins' melodramatic shit-show of a show (and i dont mean that in the bad way, necessarily).
In an early ep of WW, Leo's wife confronted him, saying that his new job was making him an absentee husband, to which he replied, "its an important job."
"Not more important than your marriage!"
"Yes! It is more important than my marriage!"
Or something like that. But anyway, that rung true. Running the free world IS more important than making sure your 60 y/o wife gets plenty of dick (and affection, etc. etc.). So, essentially, we watched the WW only concerned with the characters professional lives. With the exception of some of Josh's sexual antics and mopey Tobey's fraternal disfunctions, we saw very litte of their personal lives, and instead got to follow them as they talked about ideas. Wow, that was good TV.
But, c'mon. You expect me to believe that these TV producer guys can be so satisfied professionally that they have no personal life outside of standing up for their beliefs on gay marriage? Dont get me wrong, just because most shows seem to take place in a world where noone ever lied to the American people to justify invading Iraq, doesnt mean that all TV should avoid the pressing issues of the day.
But that also doesnt mean that you can just invent shells of characters in shells of an enviroment and expect us to have fun watching them debate. Clearly, if this show is gonna shape up, it needs to invest a little more into the personal lives of their characters.
Or at least show some boobs.
OK, so, i think Ive gotten my head around Aaron Sorkins' melodramatic shit-show of a show (and i dont mean that in the bad way, necessarily).
In an early ep of WW, Leo's wife confronted him, saying that his new job was making him an absentee husband, to which he replied, "its an important job."
"Not more important than your marriage!"
"Yes! It is more important than my marriage!"
Or something like that. But anyway, that rung true. Running the free world IS more important than making sure your 60 y/o wife gets plenty of dick (and affection, etc. etc.). So, essentially, we watched the WW only concerned with the characters professional lives. With the exception of some of Josh's sexual antics and mopey Tobey's fraternal disfunctions, we saw very litte of their personal lives, and instead got to follow them as they talked about ideas. Wow, that was good TV.
But, c'mon. You expect me to believe that these TV producer guys can be so satisfied professionally that they have no personal life outside of standing up for their beliefs on gay marriage? Dont get me wrong, just because most shows seem to take place in a world where noone ever lied to the American people to justify invading Iraq, doesnt mean that all TV should avoid the pressing issues of the day.
But that also doesnt mean that you can just invent shells of characters in shells of an enviroment and expect us to have fun watching them debate. Clearly, if this show is gonna shape up, it needs to invest a little more into the personal lives of their characters.
Or at least show some boobs.
Two faces staring at eachother of the year
The Merth Beaten Worker
N.L. Cy Young: and the winner is....Brandon Webb. Ok, I was a little late on this one (thats what she said). In all hoensty, my choice would have been trevor hoffman as a sort of lifetime achievement award. But, i mean, a 16 game winner is dominant...runner up: Roy Oswalt. Honorable Mention: Jon Lieber. (J/K!)
A.L. Cy Young: Johan Santana. Duh. I mean , this guy was sick this year, and he is cruising into a hall of fame career. In fact, stay tuned next week when i make the case for Santana winning another serious award. Also, pronounce it Joe-han, and tell me you don't smile. Runner-up: Chien-Ming Wang (I am an equal opportunity awawrd giver-outer). Honorable Mention: Roy "Holiday Road" Halliday.
Next time, JFox expains why Bobby Cox is a big stupid moron, and why the Phillies are definately, 100% happy that they hired Charlie Manuel and not Jim Leyland.
N.L. Cy Young: and the winner is....Brandon Webb. Ok, I was a little late on this one (thats what she said). In all hoensty, my choice would have been trevor hoffman as a sort of lifetime achievement award. But, i mean, a 16 game winner is dominant...runner up: Roy Oswalt. Honorable Mention: Jon Lieber. (J/K!)
A.L. Cy Young: Johan Santana. Duh. I mean , this guy was sick this year, and he is cruising into a hall of fame career. In fact, stay tuned next week when i make the case for Santana winning another serious award. Also, pronounce it Joe-han, and tell me you don't smile. Runner-up: Chien-Ming Wang (I am an equal opportunity awawrd giver-outer). Honorable Mention: Roy "Holiday Road" Halliday.
Next time, JFox expains why Bobby Cox is a big stupid moron, and why the Phillies are definately, 100% happy that they hired Charlie Manuel and not Jim Leyland.
Monday, November 13, 2006
Sunday, November 12, 2006
And your bird can sing
The Merth Beaten Worker
Alot to blog about to-day (which is to say, alot of work to procrastinate over)
1. so, apparently, you cant put pictures on blogspot
2. i saw paul mccartney yesterday. do you think he understands who he is? Also, i saw Will Arnett. Come on!
3. FU,W
4. National League Manager of the Year: Joe Girardi
5. American League Manager of the Year: Jim Leyland. Duh.
6. Congrats, Ryan Howard and Chase Utley on your first silver slugger awards.
7. Simpons tonight?
8. Who knows 8?
9. Joking Smokers, don't you think the joker laughs at you?
10. I think i'd be 10 times more inclined to read this Sarte, and 20 times more inclined to read these vietnam documents, if the Man wasnt telling me to do so.
11. LBJ, what were you thinking?
12. Rumsfeld? I mean, Come On!
13. Wii comes out this friday? who wants to go to Best Buy at 6 am with me? I am completely serious.
14. I am now accepting bets on what i will be doing next year. The vegas odds:
TFA: 2-1
Snowboard Instructor: 5-2
Trubadour: 7-4
Peace Corps: 3-1
Junior Speech Writer for Democratic Nominee for President Ed Rendell, 4-1
Fellow: 5-1
Struggling screenwriter/waitor: 6-1
Zarathustra: 7-1
Navy Intelligence Officer: 10-1
Professional She-Male: Even
Paul McCartney/Ryan Howard worshipper: 1-100
NL manager of the year: 25-1
15. Gentlemen, start your engines.
16. anyone wanna get drunk and go to the Harvard Objectivist Club meeting next friday night?
17. Know any single girls?
18. Response Paper? tomorrow? we just wrote one last week!
19. http://youtube.com/watch?v=6X0S4nYyaTk
20. Its funny because its true.
Alot to blog about to-day (which is to say, alot of work to procrastinate over)
1. so, apparently, you cant put pictures on blogspot
2. i saw paul mccartney yesterday. do you think he understands who he is? Also, i saw Will Arnett. Come on!
3. FU,W
4. National League Manager of the Year: Joe Girardi
5. American League Manager of the Year: Jim Leyland. Duh.
6. Congrats, Ryan Howard and Chase Utley on your first silver slugger awards.
7. Simpons tonight?
8. Who knows 8?
9. Joking Smokers, don't you think the joker laughs at you?
10. I think i'd be 10 times more inclined to read this Sarte, and 20 times more inclined to read these vietnam documents, if the Man wasnt telling me to do so.
11. LBJ, what were you thinking?
12. Rumsfeld? I mean, Come On!
13. Wii comes out this friday? who wants to go to Best Buy at 6 am with me? I am completely serious.
14. I am now accepting bets on what i will be doing next year. The vegas odds:
TFA: 2-1
Snowboard Instructor: 5-2
Trubadour: 7-4
Peace Corps: 3-1
Junior Speech Writer for Democratic Nominee for President Ed Rendell, 4-1
Fellow: 5-1
Struggling screenwriter/waitor: 6-1
Zarathustra: 7-1
Navy Intelligence Officer: 10-1
Professional She-Male: Even
Paul McCartney/Ryan Howard worshipper: 1-100
NL manager of the year: 25-1
15. Gentlemen, start your engines.
16. anyone wanna get drunk and go to the Harvard Objectivist Club meeting next friday night?
17. Know any single girls?
18. Response Paper? tomorrow? we just wrote one last week!
19. http://youtube.com/watch?v=6X0S4nYyaTk
20. Its funny because its true.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Monday, November 06, 2006
Little Big League
The Merth Beaten Worker
Part one of our baseball awards preview takes us on a tour of one of the best rookie seasons in recent baseball history. In the AL, young pitchers exploded onto the scene, and became integral parts of good teams. In the NL, florida showed us once again that a team needs neither money, fans, a ballpark, or a winning record against the phillies to be totally sweet.
AL Rookie of the Year: Jonathan Papelbon. SO good. All the attention may be in the motor city on this one, but the AL Champion's ace had some seriously bad games, didn't stirke out as many as he should have, and had an ERA (3.63) that doesnt exactly shout dominance. Here's one that does: 0.92. Papelbon pitched in a full 59 games, allowing only 7 earned runs in 68.3 IP on his way to earning 35 saves that kept boston in it. Even his second half melt down doesnt not make papelbon the single most promising rookie pitcher in baseball. Runner-up: Verlander. Honorable Mention: Liriano.
NL Rookie of the Year: Dan Uggla. This is a close one. Zimmerman had more RBIs (110) and a higher BA (.287) than Uggla (90, .282), and both played sick D. Uggla gets a boost for being on the Team of the Rookies, and for hitting a homerun that was enough to beat the phillies because Ryan Howard didn't hit two homeruns that game....oh wait, he did. Runner-Up: Zimmerman. Honorable Mention: Josh Johnson.
Part one of our baseball awards preview takes us on a tour of one of the best rookie seasons in recent baseball history. In the AL, young pitchers exploded onto the scene, and became integral parts of good teams. In the NL, florida showed us once again that a team needs neither money, fans, a ballpark, or a winning record against the phillies to be totally sweet.
AL Rookie of the Year: Jonathan Papelbon. SO good. All the attention may be in the motor city on this one, but the AL Champion's ace had some seriously bad games, didn't stirke out as many as he should have, and had an ERA (3.63) that doesnt exactly shout dominance. Here's one that does: 0.92. Papelbon pitched in a full 59 games, allowing only 7 earned runs in 68.3 IP on his way to earning 35 saves that kept boston in it. Even his second half melt down doesnt not make papelbon the single most promising rookie pitcher in baseball. Runner-up: Verlander. Honorable Mention: Liriano.
NL Rookie of the Year: Dan Uggla. This is a close one. Zimmerman had more RBIs (110) and a higher BA (.287) than Uggla (90, .282), and both played sick D. Uggla gets a boost for being on the Team of the Rookies, and for hitting a homerun that was enough to beat the phillies because Ryan Howard didn't hit two homeruns that game....oh wait, he did. Runner-Up: Zimmerman. Honorable Mention: Josh Johnson.
Midterm: 11/7, 20% of final grade
The Merth Beaten Worker
So, Gore Videl is calling this midterm election the most important election of his lifetime. Kos is Daily saying that this is the beginning of the equivalent of the reagan revolution (the "Ned Lamont Revoltuion" if you will). SO I just GOTTA weigh in...
First off, my predictions:
if there is no wave, i say 21 house seats and 4 senate seats go to Dems, which, if nothing else, is a statement to premiere Bush that, yes, this country can be motivated by emotions other than fear. heck, it can be even be motivated by rational thought..
if there IS a wave, i say 34 house seats, and, dare i say, 6 senate seats (im liking ex-Sec. of Navy Webb's chances)...in this case, look foward to two years of subpoenas and, like it or not, finding out about all those pig entrails that made it into the sausage that is the iraq war, medicare bill, no-child-left-behind, and energy policies.
but thats not all that important. Here are the real stories of the 2006 midterms:
1. The cementing of Karl Rove America. No longer will people have to deal with people who have different opinions than they do. All these dem house seats aint coming from kansas. rather, the few remaining moderate R's will be wiped out of DC, as NY and CA turn darker blue. What Karl Rove wants Karl Rove gets.
2. the most important story of 2006 starts with "O" and ends in "hio." Ohio tipped the scales for bush in 2004, as we all know, but after 2 years of extreme corruption in the state, a squeeze of the middle class thanks to republicans willingness to incur massive debt but not to raise the minimum wage, and the slow painful death of evangelical politics, Ohio will be shifting from red to blue this year, from top to bottom, governor, senate, congress, AG, you name it. What once was red will now be blue, perhaps for quite a few cycles. Unless Trent Lott can convince all those NYC hippies that abortion is bad and imperialism is good, there is a very good chance that the 2008 map will look alot like the 2004 map, except for one, crucial difference.
So, VOTE. no vote no voice. Our brothers are in iraq right now to make sure you have the right to go out there and flip the electoral bird at our despotic leaders. make it count, especially if your section participation grade is going to be low...
So, Gore Videl is calling this midterm election the most important election of his lifetime. Kos is Daily saying that this is the beginning of the equivalent of the reagan revolution (the "Ned Lamont Revoltuion" if you will). SO I just GOTTA weigh in...
First off, my predictions:
if there is no wave, i say 21 house seats and 4 senate seats go to Dems, which, if nothing else, is a statement to premiere Bush that, yes, this country can be motivated by emotions other than fear. heck, it can be even be motivated by rational thought..
if there IS a wave, i say 34 house seats, and, dare i say, 6 senate seats (im liking ex-Sec. of Navy Webb's chances)...in this case, look foward to two years of subpoenas and, like it or not, finding out about all those pig entrails that made it into the sausage that is the iraq war, medicare bill, no-child-left-behind, and energy policies.
but thats not all that important. Here are the real stories of the 2006 midterms:
1. The cementing of Karl Rove America. No longer will people have to deal with people who have different opinions than they do. All these dem house seats aint coming from kansas. rather, the few remaining moderate R's will be wiped out of DC, as NY and CA turn darker blue. What Karl Rove wants Karl Rove gets.
2. the most important story of 2006 starts with "O" and ends in "hio." Ohio tipped the scales for bush in 2004, as we all know, but after 2 years of extreme corruption in the state, a squeeze of the middle class thanks to republicans willingness to incur massive debt but not to raise the minimum wage, and the slow painful death of evangelical politics, Ohio will be shifting from red to blue this year, from top to bottom, governor, senate, congress, AG, you name it. What once was red will now be blue, perhaps for quite a few cycles. Unless Trent Lott can convince all those NYC hippies that abortion is bad and imperialism is good, there is a very good chance that the 2008 map will look alot like the 2004 map, except for one, crucial difference.
So, VOTE. no vote no voice. Our brothers are in iraq right now to make sure you have the right to go out there and flip the electoral bird at our despotic leaders. make it count, especially if your section participation grade is going to be low...
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